Letter #1

 

Dear God,

I wanted to write you a letter.
These days have more hours
than I have strength.

I had searched for my pen
Only to find it had no ink

I had torn a page from my book
Only to find it filled with scribbles

I had looked for a quiet place to sit
Didn’t those graders invade my solace?
Do you have a remote for muting unwanted sound?

Anyyyywwaaayyyy,
I wanted to tell you
These days seem to be worsening
I sometimes feel like
I’m always a step behind
Like, class started when
I was on my way to school

Papa, these days have a hot sun
and it’s not Christ
Papa, these days have dusty ground
and it’s not the the Chief Cornerstone
Papa, these days have colds
and not from alotta ice cream
Papa, these days have coughs
and not from choking
They are undecided
They seem distressed
They are reluctant
They seem to have given up

I have discovered walls in my mind, and I have run into demons in my heart. I know these walls shouldn’t be here. I know these demons shouldn’t be living here. Heck, they haven’t paid rent ever since they moved in. I know these facts. I also know I don’t want them here. I want the walls destroyed. I want the demons vanquished.

I want you to do it – the dirty work. The clean-up work. The demolition. The exorcism. The renovations. The painting. I want you to do that stuff. I don’t think I can do it. I don’t. I’m very confident in that. I’m more confident in my inability than I am in your ability. I want to trust your willingness, and your ability, more than I trust my unwillingness and my inability. I guess that’s where we are at right now.

I have confirmed that I have some work I need to be done, and I have fired the previous contractor, Adam & sons Construction Ltd. Now, I need to accept your bid and have you get on with the work. Only thing is, I’m still looking through your bid documents (you’ve done a helluva lotta impressive work, btw!) but I don’t know what I’m looking for. I don’t know if I’m looking for a reason to trust you or for a reason to doubt you if you fail (yea, I know, your documents show you’ve never failed, even with terrible clients, but how do I know this is not you putting your best foot forward?). I don’t know. Maybe I’m judging you on the standard of the other contractors I’ve worked with, which I guess is unfair. But, you see where I’m coming from, right? I have no trouble moving on and trusting you, so eh, I really don’t know why I’m here vetting you without any objectives. I just want to be alright. I want my mind reclaimed – all of it. I want my heart clean – all of it. I know you know. I.. I just need someone to talk to.

By the way, God,
do you work weekends?

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Dear Lucy

 

Dear Lucy,

dream the dreams
but never ever chase them.

date the frogs
but never ever kiss them.

set the goals
but never ever hit them.

Thank you for your DM. I understand that life can be an expanse of land at the banks of a waterbody.

When I was at campu, I did Bsc. CSC (Bachelor of Science in Computer Science). I was bored in my very first semester and even caught my first retake at its end. During that time, I started to let my mind and hands wander into tinkering of all sorts.

As life went by, I fidgeted, tinkered, and wondered some more. I did Graphics design, Branding of all kinds [Posters, Flyers, Logos, the whole shabang], Website & systems development, Mobile app development [Windows & Android], Illustration, Photography & Video, Audio/Video/Photo editing/retouch/manipulation, and meme creation hahaa! I was a Computer bender of all manners [hardware & software], Phone bender of all manners (had Jailbroken and Unlocked my first iPhone in 1st year), and was the go-to guy for general and specific Consultancy in all these fields.

I eventually got bored with all these things, and continued to search for something that could catch me properly.
Then I landed on animation.
That was when I stood frozen.

I imagined, dreamt, planned, plotted, and sought advice on concepts. The horizons widened and I saw empty fields of possibility ahead of me, awaiting the till, plant, tend, and harvest. And when I beheld all this opportunity, I only saw my inadequacy. I only saw my inability. I only saw the millions of weeds and the tattered scarecrows and the slithering snakes that had made “my” field their abode.

All this flakiness coming from a person that has been self-taught ever since he started the grind?
Yeap.

All this fear coming from a person who has can’t spell the word “impossible” when he’s decided to go after something?
Yeap.

Wharrapened?
Well, all the other things I was doing were the road to this thing my heart wanted.
Now, after finding that thing my heart wanted, they were my happy distractions from it. My way of stalling. Stalling because, what if I try this thing my heart [currently] longs for and I suck balls at it? What if I try and fail? What if I try and get bored after a year or two? And I’m back to square one? What if I’ve been masturbating with a dildo the size of a baby’s leg my whole single life and my husband-to-be has a regular-sized dick?

I feel like I’ve done everything under the sun (I even sold MTN lines at some point in time) and I’m sooo fucking tired at this point, like,

how much more searching must I do,

until I find something I want to do,

that won’t bore me after a year or two?

I’m soooooo fucccckkkiinnngggg tttiiiirreedddd of trying, and yet, there’s this one more thing I must try before I can properly give up on life and Christ.

I guess what I am trying to say is

For the rebellious rebel like myself, and the safe rebel like yourself, it will often seem like we’re slowly sinking in quicksand – Me, limbs flailing and reaching for everything and nothing, and you, having a mental implosion on the other paths you could have tried.

I don’t know if our stories have happy endings, but I heard somewhere that
a problem shared is half-solved.

B out ✌

 

header image source

Happy Bathday

 

So
you wake up and
step out of the bed and
dust crawls to your beautiful feet
It also knows good things when it sees them.

You wrap yourself and head to the shower
and the soap is excited to rub and
the water is excited to run
against your God-beautiful curves
with the joy of a bouncing castle
and the exhilaration of a waterfall

You step out feeling fresh and killin’
and the clothes have this whole time
been scrambling to be in your field of view
when you return to the room
They each desire to be the one you choose
The one you adorn. The one
to compliment a creature this beautiful
to embellish a creation this breath-taking

You leave the room with the sun in tow
and the moon hides under your bed
with the rest of the galaxies because
Today is light. Today is warmth.
Today is joy. Today is love.

You head out into the world
and let the sun soar above the earth
like a kite under your gentle tether
The plants stretch their necks and
the birds sing to you about their dreams
The dust seeks you out and
the winds are envious of your scent

You swing and you sway
with the majesty of parked Range-Rover
the eyes that meet you are refreshed
the feet that stand close by are washed
the arms that bypass are energized
the hearts that beat past are healed
and the sun looks down from on high
to steal glimpses of your beautiful smile.

And in the length and breadth of love
that fills and overflows from you
And in the depth and intensity of life
that drenches and seeps from you
You
You collect a piece of dust here
You collect a piece of dust there

And your papa
He lays you down in his tub
and runs the taps at max
and lathers bubbles in the millions
and refreshes your loving eyes
and washes your loving feet
and energizes your loving arms
and heals your loving heart
and as he smiles a smile of joy, he says

“This is my baby, chosen and marked by my love, delight of my life!”

and that.
that is your bathday.
Happy Bathday, Nanfuka Winfred Gloria.

Bottle v Car Radio

 

Behold, a new year is upon those of us who follow the Gregorian calendar.

I present to you this image below for it will form the rock on which I will build my church post (wait for it to load if your net is iffy).

 

bottle-v-radio-main_color

 

I shall now present to you 10 reasons Bottle is better than the Car Radio:

  1. Bottle doesn’t consume battery power. That means if you stop the engine and use Bottle for extended periods of time, it won’t drain your battery. It’s true innovation!
  2. Bottle doesn’t require nice speakers to function well. Bottle, in fact (this might come as a shocker) doesn’t require speakers AT ALL! Talk about TRUE autonomy. I believe the field of Artificial Intelligence has a leaf or two to pick from this.
  3. Bottle doesn’t need buttons to work. This means the barrier-to-entry into its ecosystem is significantly reduced. Even the illiterate can comfortably use Bottle without second-guessing themselves!
  4. Bottle is portable at all times without compromising its performance. Bottle can be removed from where it lays and towed around by the driver of the vehicle without reducing any aspect of its functionality.
  5. Bottle requires no initial setup fees, equipment, or expertise. Nobody needs an expert to install Bottle in their car. Nobody searches around for extra equipment to connect to Bottle whilst in the car. Nobody has ever gotten charged money for Bottle installation.
    Bottle thinks outside the box. Bottle works right out of the box.
  6. Bottle doesn’t pause working temporarily as you start the car. When you crank your engine, does Bottle stop functioning? Nope! You know who does? Car Radio does. Damned attention seeker, that one!
  7. Bottle is easier (and more affordable) to replace if stolen from the car. In the unfortunate event that your car is broken into, you will probably have to use your teeth to raise the windows and you will definitely need hands to act as temporary indicators. You know what car part won’t break the bank when you start replacing them? That’s right! Bottle.
    You also probably didn’t know this but, Car Radio connived with those thieves to get ‘kidnapped’. Car Radio wanted to see if you would burn down the world searching for it, as a sign of your unending love and devotion.
  8. Bottle doesn’t necessitate you to figure out the labels on it before you can use it. Regardless of whether Bottle has Chinese or English written on it, it can still be used even by the most basic of people. Try working with Car Radio without labels and see how accidents happen as you’re busy looking for the Play button.
  9. Bottle can play well with water. In fact, that’s where it seems to shine! Add liquid to Bottle and enjoy! Add liquid to Car Radio? End of relationship.
  10. Bottle’s first letter, B, comes before both Car Radio’s C and R.

IT’S JUST NOT FAIR!

Here’s some money Rufus,
help me pick Toby’s drugs.
You remember the pharmacy that did his check-up,
last week when he had just returned?
The one near the other petrol station.

But daddy why don’t you send someone else?
I already have plans I’ve made for the day.
I’m meeting an investor at Serena,
he wants to co-fund the apartments’ construction.
I don’t want to be late.

Ruf, you’re the only one in this home who can drive.
You already have the keys to the Forester and the Land Cruiser,
and anyway, the maids are busy making lunch for your brother
and the house keepers are still cleaning his room.
Who do you want me to send, now?

I don’t know.
It’s not my problem.

Rufus, it’s your brother we’re talking about here…

I don’t care, dad!
I don’t care about him and his ma-drugs!
He wouldn’t need ARVs if he hadn’t left in the first place.
He took everything and spent it on whores! Whores!
And then he carries all his diseases back here for us to treat?
See! Even in his sickness, he gets all the attention.

And me? What do I get for running the Kikuubo shops single-handedly?
What do I get for waking up at 3am every Saturday and head to Hoima to check on the farm?
UMEME. Water. Internet. Landscaping. Air Conditioning. The cars.
Even the DSTv that you bought for the maids, I pay for all of it.

I’ve even grown the businesses from when you handed them to me, after Toby took a third of the money – of YOUR money – to go and chase skirts!
I’ve done EVERYTHING you’ve ever asked me. I’ve given you EVERYTHING I have, daddy! EVERYTHING!
And what have I gotten in return? WHAT??
Kyoka Toby comes running back and you bend over backwards for him. And you pamper him. And you spoil him. You even throw a party. A PARTY!!
And me? Heh. Not even a ka-goat for me and my fellowship to roast and celebrate…

Rufus, mwana wange…
My son…
All that I have is yours.
You can celebrate all day if you want.
You are my son.

Originally adapted from this beautiful story.

Food for thought

to my person 😉


I want to massage you with my lips
and you’ll forgive me for being selfish,
because I know it’ll take a longer time
but I want to kiss away your aches


Just like we bask in him everyday
and yet
we never want to leave the overwhelming-ness
of those moments alone with him,
I want you to savor Christ when you take bites of me
and for me to taste him when I sip from you


The same way we talk about Christ
And can’t seem to see end to the thoughts
So we end the sentences with
Joyous sighs, distant grins, and
Knowing gazes,
I want to lay down in your heart’s crevices
I want to wander there through your breath
I want to set up camp in your vocal chords
I want to trek there through your lips


Just like each of us has our own vybe with Christ
With all our quirkiness and weird alike
And yet he is so individual
But still loves to be communal,
I want to paint you with surrender
And let your brush strokes blend with mine
I want us to create a hue of our own
That sways to our rhythm; that adds to our tone


I want to make your heart race,
but slowly
For you to draw your breath from my tongue
To let your heavenly face fold,
To let your sumptuous lips whimper,
In the tempo of our story
unfolding.


We surrender to each other
And wrap ourselves in white flags
We are consumed by the bright glow of
frictional bodies.
difficult muscles.
beautiful bodies.
breathtaking curves.
sensual bodies.
love.


Love’s embrace keeps us together
with a little help from the sticky sweat

Lule

 

Essimu njitadde ku nyonyi
Egende e’bugwa-njuba ob’e’Bunyonyi

Y’emanyi

nze nazze kulaba wange
Mpangaz’erinnya lya Kitange

nazze nteze enyindo, ennimi, n’amatu
nanti bebi yansuubiza omukwano gwa tattoo

Olwo nayatula;

“lubeerera na lubeerera, ngenda kujjuza..
n’otw’otugoye twewesabise ngenda tuyuza!”

Engato nsambe-sambe n’eli
Bebi antambuze ku meeli

Nnengedde amazzi, akamwenyo, n’amasavu
Omutima kwekunyweza nga Kondakita abanj’akasaanvu

Yalabbi!

Emigongo gyaffe gyekunye-kunye
Anti tusimbudde nga ajuz’za kamunye

Enyonta Yaffe k’ekirire ng’ebbeeyi ya whole sale
En’Enjiri ya babili ng’atandika home cell

awo bebi n’ankuba akagambo mu kutu
olwo nange nentyuuniinga omukutu

“sigino zeezo, bebi?”
“weew’awo, bebi!”

okugenda okusiga empeke zange
nga anzukusa ye muganda wange

kiki ekirooto kyange tebakileka kikule
nanti njagala kuyung’ebigambo nga Lule